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Rick Scott says totally badass thing to 8-year-old

February 7, 2014
By

Admittedly, the exact tone the Governor used when saying these words was not conveyed by Tampa Bay Times writer Caitlin Johnston in her report yesterday covering the 110th Annual Florida State Fair, but I think we can assume just how he said it; in response to elementary schooler Giovanni Everest, who asked, “Aren’t you in the news all the time?”, Scott tossed off this quote seemingly ported from a lost Tom Cruise movie about the white knuckle thrills of state government:

“I was on the news before you got up this morning.”

Smash cut to a montage of Rick Scott stamping documents and yelling into a cellphone set to Outkast’s “B.O.B.” Uh, of course Rick Scott is in the news all the time, 8-year-old. That law degree from Southern Methodist University didn’t earn itself! This is guy who works so hard he doesn’t even care that he doesn’t have eyebrows.

Let this be a lesson, kids: don’t set the governor up, because he will take you to the hole and dunk on you like Darryl Dawkins never happened.

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  • http://tastychomps.com/ Tasty Chomps

    he is busy doing things like i dunno blocking early voting at the University of Florida

  • http://tastychomps.com/ Tasty Chomps

    he is bad ass if you consider defrauding medicare billions of dollars “bad ass”

  • cheeseInFL

    Tasty Chomps, defrauding millions is child’s play! Obama has the government DEFRAUDING Americans for TRILLIONS through Obamacare! Now that is BAD ASS!

  • Michael Davis

    Hans Gruber was a badass. Darth Vader was a badass. Voldemort was a badass. Wait, Rick Scott *is* Voldemort.

  • Michael Davis

    Because providing incentives to buy real health insurance that isnt just a discount plan, actually covers you when you’re sick, cant refuse to pay because you might have been sick with something similar before you bought that policy, etc, is so much like fraud, amirite?